Hartwood Grove is scheduled to have our Ostara celebration this upcoming Thursday, the 17th. Seeing as I have a paper due the 18th, I wrote the group saying that I would try to make it, but with all the work ahead of me, there stood a good possibility that I would not be at circle. Z., of course, wrote back with encouragement and promised that everyone would send good energy my way if I were not able to attend. She closed with a reminder “to ground regularly before [I] stick [my] head into writing or tests or other brain strain.”
It’s a damn good reminder. I get very unbalanced during paper time. This morning, for example, I realized I hadn’t even so much as left the house for even a little walk in three days, so I walked a few blocks to Starbucks and got a large coffee (the coffee was an excuse to spend the time walking). I just tried grounding, too, and found it incredibly difficult. My mind was running all over the place and picking up on so much external stimuli–the sounds of traffic on Alder, the pinch of my jeans across my stomach, the smell of the jasmine tea brewing on my desk–and I wasn’t feeling the energy of the ground. Heck, I could barely get past the floorboards of my 2nd story room!
I guess I thought writing about the difficulty would help a little bit before I tried again. So here I go.
The second time was better visually and energetically, but I’ve still got some odd problem spots. I was able to sink my awareness down and pull up that warm, constant, powerful earth energy, channel it up through my spine and explode it into the air, where it tendrilled out in dozens of directions, grabbing and absorbing the energies of sun and air. Those positively exploded in my crown and third eye chakra, adding themselves to my already uncomfortable caffeine buzz. I spent a long time trying to get that energy to trickle down to my throat and heart chakras, to varying degrees of success. I never quite got everything to spiral about my navel and suffuse my body, like I’m so easily able to do in circle. The “center” part of “grounding and centering” doesn’t feel achieved. Frankly, I feel top light and bottom heavy and really antsy. I think I’m going to physically rest and drain for a small while.